Series: Self-Care and Inner Growth. Episode: 12
Mindfulness is not a performance or a routine – it is the practice of meeting your life as it is, with attention and care.
Over the past few weeks, we have explored inner narratives, self-acceptance, and burnout – learning how awareness changes the way we relate to ourselves.
This week, we are slowing things down even further to look at what mindfulness actually means beyond trends, apps, and expectations.
1. How Mindfulness Became Something to Perform
For many people, mindfulness now feels like another thing to get right.
A habit to maintain.
A streak to keep.
A calm state to achieve.
If you have ever felt like you are failing at mindfulness because your mind will not quiet or your routine will not stick, you are not alone.
The idea that mindfulness should make you calmer, happier, or more productive has quietly turned a practice of awareness into another form of pressure.
But mindfulness was never meant to be something you succeed at.
It was meant to be something you return to.
2. What Mindfulness Actually Is
At its core, mindfulness is about paying attention to the present moment with openness and without judgement.
It is noticing what is happening in your body, your thoughts, and your emotions as they arise, rather than trying to change them immediately.
One of the most widely used clinical approaches to mindfulness is Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction, developed by Jon Kabat-Zinn.
Research on this approach shows that mindfulness helps reduce stress and emotional reactivity not by eliminating difficult thoughts or feelings, but by changing our relationship with them.
In simple terms, mindfulness helps you respond instead of react.
3. Mindfulness in Ordinary Moments
Mindfulness does not require silence, candles, or long periods of stillness.
It lives in ordinary moments you already move through every day.
It might look like:
- noticing your breath while waiting for the kettle to boil
- feeling your feet on the ground as you walk
- recognising tension in your shoulders and softening them
- observing a thought without following it
These moments matter because they interrupt autopilot.
They bring you back into contact with yourself.
Mindfulness is not about controlling your mind.
It is about noticing it.
4. Why Mindfulness Can Feel Uncomfortable
Sometimes mindfulness brings you closer to feelings you have been avoiding.
That can feel unsettling at first.
But discomfort does not mean the practice is failing.
It often means awareness is growing.
Mindfulness teaches you that emotions rise and fall on their own when they are allowed to exist.
You do not need to suppress them or solve them immediately.
You need to notice them with kindness.
Over time, this builds emotional resilience, not because life becomes easier, but because you become more present with it.
5. Letting Mindfulness Be Gentle
You do not need to meditate perfectly.
You do not need to do it every day.
You do not need to feel calm for it to count.
Mindfulness works when it is gentle enough to return to.
When it meets you where you are, not where you think you should be.
The practice is not about escaping discomfort.
It is about learning that you can stay with yourself even when things feel messy.
🌷 The Weekly Pinky Promise
“This week, I promise to pause once each day and notice what is already here.”
It might be a breath.
A sound.
A sensation.
A thought passing through.
Nothing to fix.
Nothing to change.
Just noticing.
Share your moment using #MyPinkyPromise and remind others that presence does not have to be complicated.
🌱 The Self-Care Seed
“Choose one ordinary moment today and meet it with full attention.”
This week, pick one small daily activity and do it mindfully.
Brushing your teeth.
Drinking water.
Opening a window.
Let that moment be enough.
Presence grows through repetition, not intensity.
💗 Resources for Further Care
- Wherever You Go, There You Are by Jon Kabat-Zinn
- Mind UK – resources on mindfulness and stress
- Journal Prompt: “When do I feel most present during the day, without trying?”
🌸 Closing Reflection
Mindfulness is not about becoming calmer, better, or more disciplined.
It is about becoming more honest with your experience.
When you slow down enough to notice what is here, you begin to build a steadier relationship with yourself.
One rooted in awareness, not avoidance.
This week, let mindfulness be simple.
Let it be human.
Let it be something you return to, again and again.
Because being present is not something you achieve.
It is something you practise.
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